What's that smell?

So school for most of us is just around the corner, or for some already started.  Whether the school bus will stop by to pick up the kids, or we head down the stairs after breakfast, school is starting.  I have called this "brain warm up week"....because after a long summer, it takes awhile to re group.  I am a sucker for this time of year... for freshly opened books, pencils that have never been used, and the anticipation of great things to come.  

Praying, and filled with hope that this year will be our best year yet....at least that is the request I have laid before my Heavenly Father.  Better, Lord.  Help me to be a better teacher than last year, more patient, loving, more selfless.  Help me to not be so distracted by the daily, that I miss the moments to teach that which will last for eternity.  To lay aside what I would "rather" be doing and choose what I know I am called to be doing. 

I shared this verse with my precious friend Julie, who just this year will be stepping into the rivers of the unknown...home schooling her kids.  Oh, I just see how the Lord is moving to do amazing things for them this year.  Splash on!!

As we shared the other day our hearts of wanting to impart to our kids a love for Christ, and all the other list of 55,000 things that mama's have in their hearts.  All the things they pray their children will get and grow in.  From the smallest things like good manners at the table or making their beds, to the biggest....knowing and loving their Savior, walking in His ways, ministering effectively His joy and peace and salvation to many...and so forth and so on.

So as we were sharing, the Lord showed me this verse, you know how He faithfully does that. And, so this is my prayer for my heart this year.  For my friends who also home school and for my friends who don't.  For each of us moms, regardless of our kid's place of education, who so desire to raise our children in His faithful ways, and who realize that if it is left up to us, our strength, our goodness, our human knowledge....there is no hope.  But empowered by the Spirit, we can do all things. 

                                                             2 Corinthians 2:14

But thanks be to God, (thanking Him in anticipation for all He plans to do), who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ ( walking in His victory) and through us ( us moms) spreads everywhere (to our kids, to all)  the fragrance of the knowledge of Him.  

Spreads everywhere the fragrance..of the knowledge of Him!  oh, may that be the story of my life, the story of my day.  That His fragrance would be all over me.  Like when you have that delicious smelling candle burning in your kitchen and the delight of it wafts into every room in your house....that's what I am talking about. 

That He would emanate (is this a word that means to go forth from, to flow out of??  if not, you get the point) from me.  That He would pour forth and leave a beautiful fragrance with every person I talk with, encounter in my day.   That our school room would just be filled up with the fragrance of patience, love, hope, joy, strength...His fragrance flowing through me.  

That my kids would see in me a humility of knowing my Source of strength.   That the greatest lessons learned this year would be caught and not just taught.  May they catch me in the act each morning of reading His Word, see me giving selflessly to them and others, see me serving their dad, choosing joy when  I want to not.  You know what I mean.  Fragrance. of Him.  in this home, in my heart, flowing out to others. 

So, that's all.  well, except to admit that there are days when it stinks in here.  You know, like gross, smelly, like a fog that hangs close.   That is my flesh.  Selfish, prideful, jealous, angry, impatient, unyielding, unkind.  There are days when I need to open up the windows of my heart, confess it to the One who promises to blow fresh wind in and through me.  So that I can smell fresh and sweet once again.

Who needs Handy?

My two handsome basketball boys.  I am blessed indeed.  Like father like son I guess.  Levi has seen in Brad a passion for the game, a love for the sport and now feels the same way. 

So of course it would be a natural thing to get a hoop for the driveway.  The plastic one in our basement clearly doesn't count.

And for all of you who have put together toys for kids,  you know it is never easy.  The directions look like English but when you read them, your brain is unable to compute what they are really saying.  And it always takes longer than one might imagine...always.  And the amount of small parts and screws and baggies of weird looking things could make the strongest of men feel weary. 

So in our household, there lives a man with a tremendous amount of gifts.  A passionate love for God, faithful husband, (Happy 17 years honey, and still growing in His grace together!) incredible dad, best lawn mower on the block, committed coach, and trustworthy friend. However, and by his own admission, "handy man" is not on his gifting list. He was in a different line when that one was passed out.  And for being a laid back kind of guy that he is, let me give an example by saying we've lost some Christmas spirit before with things like getting the fresh pine tree into the base, you know White Christmas playing in the background, fire lit, cookies baking, and the blasted tree won't stay up, isn't straight, the screws aren't tightening.....you know, little handy type, "requires tools" kinda things.

So today I am giving it up for my hubby who almost single handedly put together this basketball hoop.  Because he didn't give up, because he patiently read the directions over and over, because he never lost his cool, and only needed help at the very end.  (thx to papa, uncle mark and neighbor Ray)  And according to my brother, it's possible he really ended putting together about 6  hoops because of the times he had to do things more than once.  But he kept telling Levi when he would walk through the garage and look at all the parts and pieces laying around..."we're making  progress buddy, we're making progress!"

Not just a hoop for our family to play on, but also a reminder of a dad who invests wisely in his children.  Who gives up his time, just to bless their hearts.  Who not only built the hoop, but will spend hours playing  horse, 3 on 3, and dunking to impress the neighbor kids.  

Who needs handy??

Leaves that hinder...

So, let me start with my tomato plants.  The tomatoes haven't looked healthy. Now I am not usually a name caller, but some of the fruit kinda looks deformed, funny looking, maybe even rotting?  But the plants themselves look full, green, healthy and growing taller everyday. 

Now mind you this is our first year of being gardeners, and admittedly we have lots to learn.  I found out according to one google search, that the stems with "leaves only" should be cut back because they are stealing the good nutrients from the stems that are trying hard to grow the tomatoes.  

So, I did what it said.  I mean I really did....my plants almost seem embarassed now from their nakedness!  (Is there a website to order custom vegetable covering?)   I did exactly as it had said to do... cut back every stem with leaves only, and leave all the stems with the little flower buds or tiny green tomatoes.  Yikes.  Looking at them now, I think most would shake their heads and say, "Better luck next year!"  And, I admit I am feeling nervous that I may have done them in, cut too much, gone too far.  Time will tell us if this will indeed be the very thing my plants needed to grow healthier, more beautiful tomatoes...or the shameful death of them all.

So here is what has been rattling around in my heart, a whisper I heard early in the summer, a conviction really.  Funny how God would use my tomato plants to continue to teach me and get my attention.

I have noticed that very often the plant of my life looks full.  No, really... growing tall, seems healthy, lots of green leaves just a waving in the breeze.  And to be sure, many of the leaves are good leaves.  Good things. But I have felt the need to ask God this summer to prune away that which is good, so that which is best can grow fuller and more beautiful.  

I want to be a good listener when He says..lay this down, give this up, change this plan, do this differently...His ways are best.  He knows what fruit He has in mind for my life, why do I fear or fight letting His shears get close to my leaves....the green leaves that appear to be healthy and full? I want to trust that when He cuts away anything, it is with great purpose and precision.  

 

Now mind you, I didn't give my tomatoes a choice...ready or not there I sheared!!   In my gardener wisdom ( I hear my vegetables out there mocking me!),  I understand that to cut back, means greater growth. 

God doesn't always give us a choice in our pruning or wait until we ask.  In His sovereign love for us, and His desire to see the beautiful plan of our lives unfold, He starts clipping away at the lesser things.  Making room for the God things.  Oh, I want the God things. I want what will last for eternity. A harvest unimaginable. 

But too often I allow the things that mean little, to take away from the things that mean the most.  The things I desire to do, the most important things, I often fail to do, because of busyness, distractions, selfishness. My leaves hinder my fruit.

I don't know much about gardening, don't know much about much.  But, I do know this.  Jesus said that He is the Vine and we are the branches.  Our life nutrients and vitality come through Him.  In fact, He is very clear...apart from Him, we can do nothing!  

Ask Him what "good" leaves may be hindering the vital flow to the greatest, most wonderful, and for sure the sweetest fruit you've ever known, or grown for that matter.  

1,825 days to celebrate!....(and you know I needed a calculator to figure that one out!)

So, today is big.  For my baby that is.  Mariah Faith Soucie.  She is officially 5 years old today.  She is a bundle of love for sure.  We still call her snuggle bug,  because she still loves to climb up and tuck under...holding her pink blankie close.  And, she loves to throw back her head and belly laugh when she is being tickled by daddy.  I am so blessed to be her mama.

She too is a mommy at heart.  I honestly think she has asked for a baby doll and stroller every birthday and Christmas for the last 4  years.  Seriously, our home is a mini orphanage to many.  She puts my shoes on, gets her pretend cell phone and wraps those babies up in blankets ready to hit the road.  It's her favorite thing to play.

So it was no surprise when she asked for a double stroller this year.  And, she got it.  It's a beauty too...we took it on our errands yesterday and the babies had a blast!!  

She also got a pair of dress up shoes that I think are honestly nicer looking than the wedding shoes I wore 17 years ago!  I saw them in the store and knew they were going to delight her little heart.   They did. 

No, these shoes are not the plastic kind that squeeze your toes and are so slickery on the bottom that they come with a warning label...., these are the modern day dress up shoes.  The real deal in tiny sizes.  And, when she wears them she feels grown up and like a princess, and clomps around in confidence!

You know, the older I get the more I have realized that it takes more than a pretty pair of shoes to make me feel that way.  Don't get me wrong, cute shoes, especially cheap and cute, are awesome.  But, even the fanciest of shoes don't change me when I wear them.  

See I think sometimes I wear the white bride-looking shoes...doing, saying, being, ...all that I want to be, all that I know I should be to please the Lord.  But, see, white shoes don't make me a bride.  I am a bride because my Heavenly Father calls me a bride of Christ. 

When I grab a hold of His truth and walk confidently in that, I am changed.  I have been chosen by the King?  whoa.  

I want to seek to please Him with my life not just on the days when I'm wearing "bride" shoes, but everyday...the common days.  I want to please Him on the inside, where it's just me and Him....on the middle of  a hot and long summer afternoon. When my pits are sweaty, my house is a mess and my friend in need, needs me.  Needs encouragement.  When my kids need my focused attention,  my heart needs time with Him, my husband needs me to listen.   In those moments, wearing last year's flip flops...I can walk as the bride of Christ, His Spirit empowering me to do all things well.  

Let's give it up for the runners....

So this weekend I was blessed to be a part of my parent's "farewell" at the church they have faithfully served for over 22 years.  Indeed, it would be hard to put into words how blessed I was to see my dad preach an amazing sermon (shadowmoutain.org and go to sermon archives), sit next to my beautiful mom and watch as others poured out their love on my parents, grateful for what they had invested there.

Spiritual heritage?  amen and amen.  What more would I want for my kids than to know their Nana and Papa were being rewarded by men on this earth,  not just for being good employees to a company...but for their service to the One Who will someday reward them with the words we all long to hear, "Well done, thou give and faithful servant!"  

So, at this stage in their lives it is called retirement.  To step away from what they've known, you know, take a break, "you deserve it", after all the labor you've invested in others, it's your time now.   And, yes, I pray that in this new season in life they would indeed have a break. Moments of rest, time away, being ministered to, joy in abundance, peace that passes understanding, laughter that makes you weep....however this is what I know for sure.  My parents will never retire.  Not from their service to Christ, to one another or to the people most privileged to walk beside them in this life.

You see..their race is not finished.  Until the day Christ calls them home, they will run with abandon, with purpose, with a goal in their mind's eye....for what they do for eternity is what will last.  Imagine the blessing of having them as runners ahead of me, my siblings, and grandchildren...watching their steady race, sometimes stumbling or growing weary, but always looking ahead, never giving up.  Someday handing the torch to us, that the Word would continue to be spoken and used to minister hope to others. 

No question about it.  We've seen the sweat pouring off of them.  We've watched as they've had to rest along the path, recovering from injuries, wounds, stresses, deep heartaches.   Yes, running the race is filled with great joy...but the truth is, no one will ever cross the finish line without the wounds and injuries as reminders that the race was not easy, but ever so worth it. 

Worth it, because I see in their eyes the glimmer of the prize....I know they hear the Savior's call, sometimes a whisper, but always leading them.  Run on, faithful servant!  I am always with you, I will never leave you or forsake you.  I see the cost you have paid to carry this torch, and I am the Great  Rewarder, run on, run on!

My mom and dad's life theme has been Always Living in View of Eternity...seriously, when it's all said and done, what else could be more important than that?

And, one last thing....to my mom who has faithfully loved her Lord and Savior, encouraged, supported, loved, listened to my dad for all these years.  Poured into her family with great joy and a humble servant's heart.  You are the unsung hero.  You are a delightful example of a help meet to your husband.  For every meal you delivered to a family, every word spoken with encouragement, every note of love always signed with a verse, every smile given to ease the pain in someone's heart, your gracious listening ear, every moment of "background" service so that Alive ministries would be organized and well run, every note played on your piano as a sacrifice of  praise to your Lord, finding joy in the moment... God has seen every act of service in His name, God has collected every prayer you have laid before Him, He has called you by name and is delighted in you.  He sings over you with love.  And, I rise and call you blessed indeed.

And, to my dad.  Faithful man of God...who is purposeful in choosing to enjoy life, with laughter and joy. Who I believe has been annointed with a gift of wisdom from the Lord, and has shared that with others over the years, even when it cost him personally to do so.  A faithful husband who truly loves his wife, a dad who loves his children.   Couldn't ask for a better man in leading by example, laughter by the pound, a listening ear, wisdom from the Word, a servant's heart.   

To my precious parents, Run On!....the road ahead is sure to be one of great reward, that is just Who our God is.  And, you better buy a new pair of running shoes, I believe some of the greatest journey lies just ahead, above and beyond all that we could ask or imagine....

with great love, Kendra

light sabers and mighty warriors...

I'm sitting here at my computer listening to screams, high fives, and loads of loud fun as my son celebrates his 8th birthday today.   He got a new NBA basketball game, his favorite sport and is just feeling down right happy!  I just love Levi's laughter, willing to act silly to make others laugh.  I love his strength...enduring sleepless nights of itching some times and still hanging tight.  I am so proud to be this boy's mom. 

Tonight he is blessed to have some of  his longest known and best friends in all of the world, Luke and Gabriel by his side.  As G always reminds him...I've known you my whole life!!  

This year, God has blessed Levi with a new special buddy, Eddie, who he loves to spend time with and sometimes they remind me of 2 peas in a pod!  Surrounded with buddies, what could be better.

Needless to say, after good pizza, too much cake and ice cream, bubble gum sticks, pepsi, and one amazing burping contest, we have had fun.  I think I burped the alphabet to D and then realized that when you eat too much pizza and try to belch, it hurts. 

Have you ever noticed how they love to fight, to wrestle, lead a battle...attack each other with squirt guns, it's just their nature.   I've witnessed many a battle in my days.  Especially with those plastic light sabers that light up and make sound on contact, now that's cool wrapped up for $15!  

So, the verse that came to me was the one in Phillipians 2:14-15...the part that says "shine like the stars, as you hold out the word..."  It reminded me of the light sabers.  The greatest battlers in the kingdom of  Christ are the ones who know the Word, hold it out as a great light in the darkness and use it to do battle.

Ephesians 6 is a great chapter on spiritual warfare. It says we don't wrestle with flesh and blood but against rulers, authorities, against the powers of this dark world, spiritual forces....can't fight them without the Word. You know, the Sword of the Spirit, the Word of God.  Like a light saber, only more powerful to do real damage when the enemy comes knocking with his lying schemes to get us down, defeated, feeling unworthy and tempted to give up.  God's word busts through the dark and sets captives free!

Yep, think I'll head out to the campfire and roast some marshmallows, or maybe just watch them melt in the fire.  I will have to unbutton my shorts if I eat any more sugar tonight.  

Plan on reminding these young army men that to be powerful for the Lord, a real man, a mighty warrior...you have to know the Word.  All other weapons mean nothing in the spiritual realm, but having this one in your arsenal can save you, save others, bless you in abundance, and do damage to the enemy's deadly schemes.  who needs a light saber? 

Added note to self:  

Try and do devotional time  earlier in the night, like before all the cake, ice cream and marshmallows. So the boys can listen, focus, get it, you know sit on the couch for longer than 12 seconds without jumping, hitting, laughing or burping!   Oh well, we learn as we go...

My fake pony...(picture shows pony not included!)

So, I felt like I had to write about what happened to me the other day in a restaurant.   No seriously, could go down as being one of my most embarassing moments. 

We went to a nice place after church, to celebrate Ellie's bday.  

Yep, so it all started a few weeks back when I found something at CVS pharmacy that was bound to change my life. A fake pony tail.  On a clip.  To be clipped on to the back of your head, and transform any person from daily to glam in a hot second!  Sure enough, it matched my hair color and I was so happy.  I had recently cut my hair, cute style, but it is such a bummer to try and put it in a pony tail, which is my daily stay at home mom style, only to have it be like 1/2 inch long stub.

So, back to Sunday. I wore my pony to church, just as confident as could be.  Swinging my hair around like I just got off of a photo shoot.  Feeling cute, honestly it boosted my esteem the minute I clipped it in.  Just worshipping the Lord, hands raised with my pony just a swinging around like it was praising too.

Well, at the restaurant we were having a fabulous time chatting, laughing.  I love being with Ritchie and Julie and their kids.  So, after we had all ordered, buffet plates on their way, people all around dressed in their Sunday best....Mariah climbed up on my lap to snuggle.  She had her little hands wrapped around the back of my neck just like a little love bug would.  This is what I can honestly say, what I am about to tell you happened so fast, that it took a minute for it to register in my mind.

She bumped that clip in my hair, and that long and lucious ponytail flew off the back of my head and landed on the floor a few feet from my chair.  No seriously. I grabbed the back of my head and grabbed Julie's arm...."my pony, my pony!!!  get it off the floor.  oh my word, my pony!!"  By this point I am starting to sweat like we were in the Sahara desert and I am quietly yelling at Julie to get it off the floor.  She and Ritchie are bent over the table, weeping with laughter, unable to move or help.  

Had someone gotten up to head to the buffet at that moment, they would have surely screamed, MOUSE!!! if they had seen that blasted brown ponytail laying on the ground.

Oh, just the thought of it....are you tracking with me???  

So, eventually Julie in her gracious way, however slow it might have been, leaned out, snatched that thing off the ground and had the audacity to tell me to lean over so she could clip it back in.  Clip it back in????   Oh, like that wouldn't have been obvious in the middle of a busy restaurant on brunch day!! 

I am sure the waitress was wondering what happened to the glamorous girl at the end of the table, ordering confidently and chatting with abandon.  When she came back to deliver the scrambled eggs, she found a dejected, normal looking housewife, with a ponytail stub at the back of her neck, bobby pins sticking out wildly, and a large brown hairpiece hanging out of the side of her purse.

So, that's the truth of it, and I am not sure I will be able to wear that again.  But maybe I could secure it better, more pins, it is cute, it is a perfect match...well, we'll see about that.